


Lockdown Lovers

by notoneforreality



Series: QB-B3 007 Fest 2020 [25]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F, M/M, R is going to have Words, Relationship Reveal, Secret Relationship, Texting, Zoom Call, everyone is suprised, lockdown - Freeform, lockdown meetings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:54:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25465822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notoneforreality/pseuds/notoneforreality
Summary: Lockdown meetings give an insight into colleagues homes and private lives.No one was expecting what they spotted in Q's flat.
Relationships: James Bond/Q, R/Agent Bobby Carter
Series: QB-B3 007 Fest 2020 [25]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1795726
Comments: 12
Kudos: 252





	Lockdown Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> Written for--  
> This prompt from the 2020 anon list: Lockdown video call shennanigans

The zoom meeting is at eight in the morning, and whilst Connie would normally have been in the Q-Branch for at least an hour by now, being at home meant she’s still half asleep. She’s trying really hard to listen to R talking about plans for the next chunk of lockdown, but she keeps drifting out of it, glancing towards where her gaming PC is set up at the desk. 

She’s not so out of it, though, that she doesn’t notice the movement in the back of Q’s display.

A quick glance at R shows that she’s reading from notes, and she probably won’t notice if Connie looks away for a moment, so Connie grabs her phone, checks that Sam has himself muted, and shoots him a message.

_ Wolfsbane: Is there someone in Q’s flat?????? _

In his square on the screen, Sam startles, and then glances across at his screen before looking down. Connie decides she can wait for him to text back and shifts her attention back to Q’s little picture.

Q looks perfectly attentive, his eyeline slightly down where he’s watching the screen under his webcam. He’s just as bright eyed and smartly-dressed as usual — at least as far as was visible in the video call — and occasionally his eyes flicker side to side as he reads or types something. In the background, through the office door, Rameses is visible, perched on the end of the couch with his tail flicking lazily.

What’s more interesting, however, is the shifting shadow playing across the sliver of floor visible between Q’s shoulder and the doorframe.

_ I Do Not Like Them: y wld thr b sm1 n qs flt? _

Connie rolls her eyes when R is distracted talking to George. It’s honestly impressive how badly Sam texts, especially because she’d helped him reinstall autocorrect after he managed to delete it. Reading messages from him that aren’t through internal emails is like trying to read hieroglyphs.

_ Wolfsbane: Would it kill you to use a vowel?? _

_ Wolfsbane: Idk why there’d be someone in Q’s flat but I think there is _

_ Wolfsbane: Check the shadows _

Even as she sends the text, the shadows shift again, looming closer, and Connie catches a glimpse of one bare foot before it retreats again. Ram opens his mouth in something that could be a yowl or a yawn, impossible to tell without sound, and then Romulus strolls past where the foot had been.

_ I Do Not Like Them: wld it kill u 2 use less question marks? _

_ I Do Not Like Them: ok i saw that foot _

_ I Do Not Like Them: ys there some1 in qs flat? _

_ Wolfsbane: *fewer _

_ Wolfsbane: Omg did the bossman Get It?? _

The bossman definitely can get it; Connie would have made a pass if she didn’t have it on good authority that he was exclusively interested in men. She frowns. As the thought is running through her mind, it comes up on her lock screen, too, under Sam’s nickname.

_ I Do Not Like Them: but lockdown tho? _

R is still talking about coding, which Connie doesn’t get involved in, so she doesn’t feel too bad about sending one last text to Sam before she commits to paying attention.

_ Wolfsbane: Does the bossman have a secret boyfriend??? _

She leaves it at that for a while, ignoring her phone buzzing with Sam’s reply. R is just about finished with coding, which means weapons is next, and Connie needs to pay attention for that, in case she needs to answer or explain anything.

The next moment of interest occurs a little while after R has handed over the reins of the meeting to Q.

Q moves his camera to show something he’s been working on, tipping it sideways and down. The angle of it means there’s a wider view of the living room in the background, which is enough that Connie gets to see a pair of dark jeans cross the space.

So does half the rest of the chat. Connie sees them perk up, a few eyes flickering, watching other people to see if they’d seen it too.

They have a group chat without Q and R, because although Q and R are cool, they are also the bosses, and you can’t share everything with your bosses. It blows up almost immediately

**_No Quick Response:_ **

_ Jess: is there a man in q’s flat _

_ Harry: Who tf is that behind Q? _

_ Robin: ?? jeans _

_ Oscar: Everyone watch q _

Connie sighs.

_ Connie: Everyone do Not _

_ Connie: You think they won’t notice?? _

_ Sam: ths s y n1 hr s 00 _

_ Robin: … _

_ Robin: @Connie _

_ Robin: translate pls _

_ Harry: No wait I think I’ve got this one  _

_ Harry: ‘this is why no one here is a 00’ _

_ Jess: o right _

The computer screen is at the perfect angle to prop up Connie’s phone so she can keep glancing at it whilst also watching what Q is saying, and what R is doing. The others are completely failing at anything close to subtlety, all of them either staring down at their phones, or watching their screens with unnerving intensity, presumably keeping an eye on Q’s background.

_ Oscar: I wonder if r knows _

_ Jess: probably. they're friends _

Except, two minutes later, Q adjusts his camera again, and everyone gets a very clear shot of Double-oh Seven sat on the couch with no shirt on and Rom curled up on his lap, and R’s eyes go wide, her eyebrows jumping up to her hijab. She’s obviously forgotten to put herself back on mute after speaking, because she says “Bloody hell,” and it comes through the speakers very clearly, the outline of her image flickering green.

Q blinks and finishes adjusting his camera so it’s just himself and the door frame in the picture. He doesn’t look like he’s realised what’s happened and is trying to hide it, but maybe he’s been improving his acting since the not-much-of-a-surprise surprise birthday party he’d tried to secretly organise for R.

“Yes, R? Are you okay?”

“Um,” R says. For a disappointing moment, Connie thinks she’s going to suggest they talk about it later. She must see how much everyone else is watching, though, and says, “Why is Bond in your flat?”

Holy shit. Agent Bond? 

For all Bond has spent more and more time loitering in Q-Branch (oh god, was he coming to see his boyfriend?), Connie doesn’t know him that well. She certainly doesn’t know him well enough to decide whether the jeans everyone had glimpsed belong to him or not. R, however, is dating Bond’s apparent best friend, and Connie knows for a fact that they’ve spent time with each other outside of work because she caught them in the Wetherspoons across Vauxhall Bridge once: R, Agent Carter, and Agent Bond.

R would probably be able to recognise Bond’s jeans.

Q startles and tries to say several things at once, which just results in an incoherent mumble.

**_No Quick Response:_ **

_ Oscar: Fucking hell _

_ Jess: holy shit is q banging bond _

_ Harry: Is Bond banging Q? :eyes: _

“Extra protection,” Q says after what feels like ten minutes of him sputtering and trying to come up with a story. “You know, the Quartermaster is an important job, and I usually spend most of my time in-branch, behind Six’s security. So….”

He trails off and Connie nearly laughs because literally everyone else on the zoom call looks unbelievably skeptical.

Before he has a chance to say anything else, however, a hand wraps itself over the back of his chair and pulls him away so he’s not taking up the whole picture.

“We’ve been married for three years,” Agent James Bond says. “And I believe it’s now one o-clock, which means this meeting is over. Good day to you all. R.”

And then Q’s screen goes black.

There’s silence.

Then R says, “I’m going to kill them both.” and ends the call.

Then Connie’s phone explodes with notifications.

Well.

She leaves the chat to freak out for two hours and comes back when it’s died down a little.

**_No Quick Response:_ **

_ Connie: So, what are we getting them as a late wedding present?? _

**Author's Note:**

> Keep notes:  
> \--Wolfsbane: Connie>Aconite>Wolfsbane (also she's scared of dogs and Sam thinks it's funny)  
> I Do Not Like Them: I do not like green eggs and ham; I do not like them, Sam I Am  
> No Quick Response: because they're all bad at replying and also there's no Q & R (aka QR)(aka QR code)(aka Quick Response code)(aka I think I'm funny)  
> \--Sam's typing is like hieroglyphs bc hieroglyphs don't have vowels (aka I think I'm clever)  
> \--Connie was supposed to be a throwaway character for another fic and now I love her  
> \--ditto for Sam but I love Connie more soz Sam  
> \--I have Opinions on the use of less vs fewer and how nearly everyone uses it incorrectly and I try very hard not to correct people but Connie does not have the same restraint


End file.
